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Nov. 22nd, 2012 06:25 pmHurt my back really bad. Love being called a drama queen by husband and mother when I hurt so much I am on the floor crying and cant breathe from the pain. Joe was teasing, but that still hurt. Yes I'm fat. Yes I need to exercise more. This isn't from that. This is from sleeping funny.
Will edit and explain this more later.
Will edit and explain this more later.
Watching tv cause I'm feeling Pleh
Aug. 26th, 2012 10:16 pmRobin falls down the stairs into the batcave for the first time. Sirens blare "intruder alert!" yet the cave opens up as normal, batmobile comes out of hiding, super computer turns on. WTF?
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Batman is talking to the shrink describing his past/ childhood.
In the most incredulous voice "what you are describing are repressed memories". No shit Sherlock o.o
---
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
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Aug. 25th, 2012 11:01 pmUnmedicated OCD talking right now and probably wont make much sense. Ignore if you want. this is therapeutic for me.
I am really...really mad at the hospital I visited while on vacation. Here is the very unprofessional and rather scathing letter I would LOVE to address to the doctor and admitting nurse on duty the night I visited.
Dear Dr. Ahmed;
I am writing you this letter to kindly request you go back to medical school, and re-take the courses on reading patient admitting charts. I admit accidents do occur and for all I know telling the admitting nurse that I am in the process of switching from celexa to cymbalta may have been too much for him to process, thus he could potentially have just put down that I am taking both and not mention cymbalta is a -new- medication for me. I am an ignorant person in the field of medicine, and while camping in a wooded area if i get weird patches on my ankles I am going to assume they are bug bites.
Three days after starting the cymbalta, I started experiencing welts on my skin, that later on in the evening turned into blisters. Hence going to the hospital. I thought I was bitten by something bad (brown recluse anyone?). Never have I felt so dismissed in my entire life. You waltzed in, glanced at my poor feet, declared there was no way to tell what sort of bites they were (or from what insect), told me I had cellulitis (infected bug bites), and sent me on my way.
I could have -died- you assholes. No testes were taken (no swabs, biopsies, bloodwork,. I was so scared I was willing to have bloodwork done. I am fucking terrified as hell of needles, but i had fucking blisters and welts on my skin, you also asked for NO BACKGROUND WHATSOEVER ON MY MEDICATIONS EITHER!), just one single quick glass at Samantha, and not a single look at Jason (let me amuse myself, i named my blisters).
The ONLY reason I realized it was an allergic reaction (POTENTIALLY LIFE THREATENING!) was when I got home 5 days after the ER visit. That day I was supposed to up my dose of cymbalta. I dont even want to think of what would happen had I done that. When I got home, I ended up talking to my mother on the phone who viewed pictures of Samantha and Jason and freaked the fuck out on me. I dont blame her. Her daughter could have went into anaphalactic shock and died because you and your admitting RN were lazy fucks.
...tempted to fight paying this fucking bill. Your lazy asses nearly had me killed (i could be being a bit dramatic but it is a possibility, i DID almost go back to the hospital on Sunday a week after the first visit, and after we got home, because my neck started [b]swelling[/b] (not a lot, but it was VERY tender)...this was 3 days after i stopped taking the cymbalta).
Your very angry patient:
Me.
I am really...really mad at the hospital I visited while on vacation. Here is the very unprofessional and rather scathing letter I would LOVE to address to the doctor and admitting nurse on duty the night I visited.
Dear Dr. Ahmed;
I am writing you this letter to kindly request you go back to medical school, and re-take the courses on reading patient admitting charts. I admit accidents do occur and for all I know telling the admitting nurse that I am in the process of switching from celexa to cymbalta may have been too much for him to process, thus he could potentially have just put down that I am taking both and not mention cymbalta is a -new- medication for me. I am an ignorant person in the field of medicine, and while camping in a wooded area if i get weird patches on my ankles I am going to assume they are bug bites.
Three days after starting the cymbalta, I started experiencing welts on my skin, that later on in the evening turned into blisters. Hence going to the hospital. I thought I was bitten by something bad (brown recluse anyone?). Never have I felt so dismissed in my entire life. You waltzed in, glanced at my poor feet, declared there was no way to tell what sort of bites they were (or from what insect), told me I had cellulitis (infected bug bites), and sent me on my way.
I could have -died- you assholes. No testes were taken (no swabs, biopsies, bloodwork,. I was so scared I was willing to have bloodwork done. I am fucking terrified as hell of needles, but i had fucking blisters and welts on my skin, you also asked for NO BACKGROUND WHATSOEVER ON MY MEDICATIONS EITHER!), just one single quick glass at Samantha, and not a single look at Jason (let me amuse myself, i named my blisters).
The ONLY reason I realized it was an allergic reaction (POTENTIALLY LIFE THREATENING!) was when I got home 5 days after the ER visit. That day I was supposed to up my dose of cymbalta. I dont even want to think of what would happen had I done that. When I got home, I ended up talking to my mother on the phone who viewed pictures of Samantha and Jason and freaked the fuck out on me. I dont blame her. Her daughter could have went into anaphalactic shock and died because you and your admitting RN were lazy fucks.
...tempted to fight paying this fucking bill. Your lazy asses nearly had me killed (i could be being a bit dramatic but it is a possibility, i DID almost go back to the hospital on Sunday a week after the first visit, and after we got home, because my neck started [b]swelling[/b] (not a lot, but it was VERY tender)...this was 3 days after i stopped taking the cymbalta).
Your very angry patient:
Me.
August 10th, I meet my shrink for the first time. I am scared and nervous. Im either gonna clam up, not shut up, or become super defensive. Going is something I need to do and I know this but it doesn't stop me from freaking out. New places. New people. That's why it took me a whole freaking year to make the appt. :/ always afraid (for no reason, I know) that I'm in the wrong place, some one will be upset at me, I donno. I just get so anxious.
But I need to go. There is so much going on in my mind that my primary doc can't handle. I'm anxious all the time when I'm alone in public. I am hallucinating both with my eyes, and my ears ( more visual but I do hear things on occasion). My inability to even go into my own -yard- alone. My mental OCD. Yada Yada... It's super freaking hard to fight the anxiety to even call the place. :/
It boils down to: I'm scared.
Also kinda getting grumpy. We leave on vacation the day after I see the doc. We have next to no money saved for said trip. For once it's not me shopping my anxieties away. Joe and Troy got into Magic: The Gathering. I can't even tell you how much money they've collectively put into the game in the past month. If you figure on average a booster costs $4 (15 cards), and a deck $12 (60 cards). Troy alone has enough cards to make at least 6 decks, with a good chunk of cards left over (I'm guessing about 200-300$ worth of cards). Joe is the same. :/ all in the past MONTH. At least wait until after the trip :(. -whines-
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
waiting for everyone to wake up
May. 4th, 2012 07:22 amoh.my.fuck.
Last night was even better than NYCs show. Mostly because Rammstein played more of their greatest hits and I knew nearly all the songs except two.
I have had almost no sleep (something like 10 hours in 3 days?), and i am starving right now... but it was all worth it. My hearing is lowered. I cannot talk well (best way to put it, it feels like there is a lump in my throat). I couldnt help screaming more at this concert than i did in NYC. I knew the energy, I know the power of the music (as cheezy as that sounds). Just shutting up for once and listening to the packed crowd singing to Du Hast... it was awe inspiring.
Ok so back the fun train up a bit so I can explain. Joe discovered earlier this year or laaate last year that Rammstein was touring again. Collective cheering from my sister and I. We scramble to see where they are playing and if we can afford the tickets. Carrie rushed to book the cheapest decent inn we could find (with a pool!!! for freaking 60$/night) then it was just counting down the months. weeks. days. hours. Oh man near then end i am surprised Joe didnt whip out a ball gag for me.
our trip was scheduled to be in Cleveland, we have been here before just for a road trip to the zoo. we are such dorks. we also knew this wonderful city has the most amazing store called Big Fun. Think Toys R Us for retro toy nerds condensed into a store the size of two hotel rooms. This place is -packed- to the rafters with TOYS. every thing from cheap kazoos to vintage MIB Chatty Cathy dolls. If I could afford it, I WOULD buy their near mint with box MLP Dream Castle (original pink with blue turrets), but even though it tickles me to no end that a store sells my beloved ponies somewhere, I cant bring myself to pay $175 for it. We knew we HAD to make a stop at this store. HAD to. I start researching addresses and maps a few days before the concert and discover there are TWO FREAKING TWO Big Funs! OMG WE NEED TO GO TO THE SECOND ONE (Havent yet at the time of this post)
I come up with an rough time table. Leave at about 7ish am, get breakfast at subway, hit road, get to Cleveland around 11 when Big Fun opens, then get Golden Corral, hit the zoo, maybe take a dip, then scream my lungs out. A lot for a day i know, but we've done similar.
Yeah things never go to plan but thats the fun part of our excursions. Expect the unexpected. Joe got tired driving since he only had about 2 hours of sleep. We found an awesome beach (i got burned xD) to relax at for a bit. the water and the sky... blended. it was beautiful. We hit construction traffic. Meh. Carrie was sore as hell from Overnight at Crackdonalds so we decided to skip the zoo today.
We get into the city about noon. I put an hour into the parking meter. those with us that have never been here before go !!! cause i did that. Katie, you cant possibly think we will be here that long. I grin. 45 minutes ;P I love that store. My only "has a sad" is that after I made my selections, i found the vintage Voltron lions. I knew i would have to pass if just because I was buying a near mint Mail Order Stockings MLP. Complete with factory curl. Her only flaw is some possible pindot mold. Meh. I dont care. I love Stockings, she is one of those ponies I've always wanted. 30$ in a vintage specialty store is very reasonable. I also made a discovery while there that had me squeaking with delight. for only $5 there was a Mr. Snuffaluphagus plastic figurine!!! MIIIIIIIIIIINE!!! Mr. Snuffy was always my favorite Sesame Street character. Now I have one for my desk :D
Next it was time to go find the hotel, check in and crash cause none of us slept xD We are so dumb :P that quickly got vetoed since there was a pool on site and it was nearly 90 effin degrees outside. mmmmmm cold water. we didnt swim like we normally do, just sort of hung out and relaxed. Gotta conserve that energy ^^ Next was find food. There are no Chick-fil-As in NY except in NYC, so we decided to hit that up, since we've been to one before and love it. This place was amazing. good food, awesome staff. it was like a fast food sit down restaurant. they would go around asking if you wanted refills, offer to take your trays when you were done, and all of the staff were super happy. We managed to 'win' a stuffed Eat Mor Chikin cow :P
at this time it was nearing 6. tiiiime to head on into the city, find parking and figure out how to get our tickets :) we got there at about 6:30, got a good parking spot for $10 across the street, got in the correct line, and at 7 the doors opened. We instantly got in line to get shirts xD $60 for two shirts isnt too bad. I got a "We're all living in Amerika" shirt with the flag on the front and the lyrics in the back. Carrie got the same one xD Joe got one with the Rammstein logo with fire behind it on the front, and just the band name on the back.
Looking for our seats we discovered the entrance to the 200 lvl was blocked off. there was a table with some guys with a huge stack of tickets. They looked at ours and traded them for 100 lvl seats. FUCKING SCORE. We were no longer in the back of the arena in the nose bleeds. now in the curve of the bowl and lower. mmmmm.
there was no opening band. just a put together techno melee of Rammstein songs accompanied by a video that kinda got annoying after the first 10 minutes. It was good at first but you know, the crowd gets restless xD
Band came out and we all start screaming. From there i cant even describe it. It was just an awesome show. Older stuff that I know better. Lots and lots of scream-singing. we will leave it at that. :P we decided to wait a few minutes for the arena to clear out before heading to the car. Made it easy to get out. I almost begged for a Rammstein flag :P
Got to the car, enjoyed the mild breeze, and waited for the parking garage to nearly empty, got out and got lost going back to the hotel xD Wasnt too bad though. Thanks to Carries boyfriend who had GPS we got back just a bit later than normal.
now... i am just waiting to go get breakfast, so we can check out, go to the zoo and head Golden Corral (also something we dont have in Buffalo), and then head home.
this has been an amazing experience. I currently have almost no voice. My hearing is probably slightly compromised for a bit. I am rather sore. I DONT CARE!
now... PEOPLE WAKE UP!!! I HUNGER!
Last night was even better than NYCs show. Mostly because Rammstein played more of their greatest hits and I knew nearly all the songs except two.
I have had almost no sleep (something like 10 hours in 3 days?), and i am starving right now... but it was all worth it. My hearing is lowered. I cannot talk well (best way to put it, it feels like there is a lump in my throat). I couldnt help screaming more at this concert than i did in NYC. I knew the energy, I know the power of the music (as cheezy as that sounds). Just shutting up for once and listening to the packed crowd singing to Du Hast... it was awe inspiring.
Ok so back the fun train up a bit so I can explain. Joe discovered earlier this year or laaate last year that Rammstein was touring again. Collective cheering from my sister and I. We scramble to see where they are playing and if we can afford the tickets. Carrie rushed to book the cheapest decent inn we could find (with a pool!!! for freaking 60$/night) then it was just counting down the months. weeks. days. hours. Oh man near then end i am surprised Joe didnt whip out a ball gag for me.
our trip was scheduled to be in Cleveland, we have been here before just for a road trip to the zoo. we are such dorks. we also knew this wonderful city has the most amazing store called Big Fun. Think Toys R Us for retro toy nerds condensed into a store the size of two hotel rooms. This place is -packed- to the rafters with TOYS. every thing from cheap kazoos to vintage MIB Chatty Cathy dolls. If I could afford it, I WOULD buy their near mint with box MLP Dream Castle (original pink with blue turrets), but even though it tickles me to no end that a store sells my beloved ponies somewhere, I cant bring myself to pay $175 for it. We knew we HAD to make a stop at this store. HAD to. I start researching addresses and maps a few days before the concert and discover there are TWO FREAKING TWO Big Funs! OMG WE NEED TO GO TO THE SECOND ONE (Havent yet at the time of this post)
I come up with an rough time table. Leave at about 7ish am, get breakfast at subway, hit road, get to Cleveland around 11 when Big Fun opens, then get Golden Corral, hit the zoo, maybe take a dip, then scream my lungs out. A lot for a day i know, but we've done similar.
Yeah things never go to plan but thats the fun part of our excursions. Expect the unexpected. Joe got tired driving since he only had about 2 hours of sleep. We found an awesome beach (i got burned xD) to relax at for a bit. the water and the sky... blended. it was beautiful. We hit construction traffic. Meh. Carrie was sore as hell from Overnight at Crackdonalds so we decided to skip the zoo today.
We get into the city about noon. I put an hour into the parking meter. those with us that have never been here before go !!! cause i did that. Katie, you cant possibly think we will be here that long. I grin. 45 minutes ;P I love that store. My only "has a sad" is that after I made my selections, i found the vintage Voltron lions. I knew i would have to pass if just because I was buying a near mint Mail Order Stockings MLP. Complete with factory curl. Her only flaw is some possible pindot mold. Meh. I dont care. I love Stockings, she is one of those ponies I've always wanted. 30$ in a vintage specialty store is very reasonable. I also made a discovery while there that had me squeaking with delight. for only $5 there was a Mr. Snuffaluphagus plastic figurine!!! MIIIIIIIIIIINE!!! Mr. Snuffy was always my favorite Sesame Street character. Now I have one for my desk :D
Next it was time to go find the hotel, check in and crash cause none of us slept xD We are so dumb :P that quickly got vetoed since there was a pool on site and it was nearly 90 effin degrees outside. mmmmmm cold water. we didnt swim like we normally do, just sort of hung out and relaxed. Gotta conserve that energy ^^ Next was find food. There are no Chick-fil-As in NY except in NYC, so we decided to hit that up, since we've been to one before and love it. This place was amazing. good food, awesome staff. it was like a fast food sit down restaurant. they would go around asking if you wanted refills, offer to take your trays when you were done, and all of the staff were super happy. We managed to 'win' a stuffed Eat Mor Chikin cow :P
at this time it was nearing 6. tiiiime to head on into the city, find parking and figure out how to get our tickets :) we got there at about 6:30, got a good parking spot for $10 across the street, got in the correct line, and at 7 the doors opened. We instantly got in line to get shirts xD $60 for two shirts isnt too bad. I got a "We're all living in Amerika" shirt with the flag on the front and the lyrics in the back. Carrie got the same one xD Joe got one with the Rammstein logo with fire behind it on the front, and just the band name on the back.
Looking for our seats we discovered the entrance to the 200 lvl was blocked off. there was a table with some guys with a huge stack of tickets. They looked at ours and traded them for 100 lvl seats. FUCKING SCORE. We were no longer in the back of the arena in the nose bleeds. now in the curve of the bowl and lower. mmmmm.
there was no opening band. just a put together techno melee of Rammstein songs accompanied by a video that kinda got annoying after the first 10 minutes. It was good at first but you know, the crowd gets restless xD
Band came out and we all start screaming. From there i cant even describe it. It was just an awesome show. Older stuff that I know better. Lots and lots of scream-singing. we will leave it at that. :P we decided to wait a few minutes for the arena to clear out before heading to the car. Made it easy to get out. I almost begged for a Rammstein flag :P
Got to the car, enjoyed the mild breeze, and waited for the parking garage to nearly empty, got out and got lost going back to the hotel xD Wasnt too bad though. Thanks to Carries boyfriend who had GPS we got back just a bit later than normal.
now... i am just waiting to go get breakfast, so we can check out, go to the zoo and head Golden Corral (also something we dont have in Buffalo), and then head home.
this has been an amazing experience. I currently have almost no voice. My hearing is probably slightly compromised for a bit. I am rather sore. I DONT CARE!
now... PEOPLE WAKE UP!!! I HUNGER!
Writer's Block: Words to Live by
Jan. 5th, 2012 03:40 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
All that we have seen or seem, is but a dream with in a dream. --Edgar Allen Poe
All that we have seen or seem, is but a dream with in a dream. --Edgar Allen Poe
Writer's Block: Merry Christmas
Dec. 25th, 2011 09:47 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
A family picture with everyone in it
and a sewing machine cover that Mommy made :D
A family picture with everyone in it
and a sewing machine cover that Mommy made :D
Writer's Block: Chicken soup
Dec. 17th, 2011 01:02 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
bed rest, chicken soup, OJ and LOTS of water.
bed rest, chicken soup, OJ and LOTS of water.
Writer's Block: B.Y.O.B. Holidays
Dec. 16th, 2011 03:28 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
Simple and sweet answer is WAR. Sadly it is so ingrained in us that it is something I dont think we will ever solve.
Simple and sweet answer is WAR. Sadly it is so ingrained in us that it is something I dont think we will ever solve.
Writer's Block: B.Y.O.B. Holidays
Dec. 13th, 2011 07:23 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
a gravy shaker, and a heating pad :P
a gravy shaker, and a heating pad :P
Writer's Block: B.Y.O.B. Holidays
Dec. 12th, 2011 06:31 am[Error: unknown template qotd]
Christmas and New Years ;D
Christmas and New Years ;D
Writer's Block: Occupy Wall-et
Nov. 23rd, 2011 01:24 am[Error: unknown template qotd]
roughly $50k... which is my school loans. We -just- made our last payment on the last credit card 2 weeks ago so i am now 100% credit card debt freeeee!!!
roughly $50k... which is my school loans. We -just- made our last payment on the last credit card 2 weeks ago so i am now 100% credit card debt freeeee!!!
Writer's Block: An intimate portrait
Nov. 20th, 2011 12:46 am[Error: unknown template qotd]
"Holy Shit!"
"Holy Shit!"
(no subject)
Nov. 6th, 2011 01:20 amIn an attempt to eat healthier i am going to -try- to make dinner more at home. Heres hoping this works. We went and got about $50 worth of food today, but a good chunk of it was meats. Enough to make LOTS of beef stew. ;D I am not complaining and neither is joey ^_^ we love it.
I also have ideas for a pierogi lasagna. and of course theres always my pasta bake :) I just want to eat better.
I also have ideas for a pierogi lasagna. and of course theres always my pasta bake :) I just want to eat better.
